After the big announcement of the engagement has been made via social media (including, of course, an engagement ring selfie) , the dust settles and the real work begins.
Picking out the cake, the band, the venues, the colors….The list is exhausting, but exhilarating. Getting lost in the thrills of having all eyes focused on the happy couple–and especially the bride–feels indulgent and almost, at times, like being a celebrity. All the planning details are important to an excited bride. There will be incredible temptation to post about every vendor meeting, the dress designs, cake flavors and also the bumps along the road to the wedding. And there will be a few bumps.
Brides beware: there is a right way and a wrong way to do social media when planning the
wedding. Indulge social media friends with the fun aspects of wedding planning, but don’t go overboard. Share a few cake-tasting photos or photos of dresses that just didn’t work but were still silly and fun to share. Don’t log down social media feed with wedding items. And never, EVER post pictures of a wedding day ensemble …some things should remain under wraps. When posting updates on wedding planning, the couple’s wedding website should serve as the primary source. Feel free to post on social media about updates made to the wedding site. If friends want to read about the wedding, let them do so at their own behest.
Wedding registries are a big part of wedding planning, but sharing registry details openly is a huge breach of etiquette. Word of mouth is the best way for guests to discover registry details. Guests should ask…they should not be told. The only way around word of mouth is to post registries on the wedding web site; this allows guests to discover the details themselves. Gift registry etiquette also needs to address the new trend of Honeypots (registries to help pay for the Honeymoon) and fundraising sites. Yes, many newlyweds prefer cash to buy what they want or need. Again, though, the request of cash gifts should be expressed via word of mouth. Do not scribe posts that infer that a couple prefers money. As Anna Post writes: “Just remember: In the end, the choice of gift is always up to the giver , so great aunt Edna might still buy you a blender.”
Be gracious, be kind and be smart when posting updates about the upcoming nuptials. When the wedding day arrives, the festivities and excitement of the day will provide ample opportunities for social media updates and photos. The wedding, after all, is the main course of the social media event entree.